Personal     [all categories]
  Love & Romance
  My would be wife is being tortured by her father. Help me please

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq | search

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   My would be wife is being tortured by her father. Help me please
lovingperson
Junior Member
posted March 10, 2003 10:12     Click Here to See the Profile for lovingperson     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Hi there every body. I am from America. I loved a girl from Iran. (She had the advance permission from her parents) to love me. For about nine months we exchanged our love on internet. Then we spoke on telephone extensvely. We are so much in love with each other that only God knows. Few weeks ago, when I told her that I am coming to Iran to marry her and take her with me. She and all her famiy including aunts and uncles were extremely delighted and she told me that her parents are telling her to convey this message to you that," Our hearts and doors are open for you too." Lo and behold, I purchased a ticket and called her to let her know. (as I used to do on regular basis) but First time ever, she didn't pick up the phone, insead her Mom spoke and told me that don't call her any more. Then I heard some very bad words from her father too and they completely closed their doors upon me without any reason. So much so that even today I don't know in what condition my would be wife is. During all this period I had received four very disturbing letters from her and it seems that her father and her eldest sister have literally tied her down and may be beating her too. She has begged me to forget her and she says that she is extremely fearful of her life and her furure because according to her...."Her father and her elder sister don't agree with this marriage any more. She has also told me that in Iran nothing can be done and that although she is 21 years old, still she cannot step out of her house without the permission of her parents or being accompanied by her mom or brother. She says she cannot touch the computer or pick up the phone. Twenty four hours some body is sitting around to watch her movements. She cannot obtain her passport neither she has her birth certificate in her hand and that she is very fearful of her life. She secretly sent me her latest photo. By this photo it looks like that if this situation continued any further either she will die on her own or her father will kill her any way.
My question to any body and every body is...... Is there really no way out in Iran that a young beauiful woman can be saved from those atrocities and be given a choice of her own life. Is there no such institution there that can help a helpless young girl. In civilized countries, we always have any and every kind of help available. She and I are very much afraid of her life. If Somebody is interested (in helping) I can show you few of her letters that even a mountain will melt down but not her father. I beg you all please to help me in the name of humanity and in the name of God who has created us equal. If you help me, you will help her in turn and one day I will return this favor.
PLEASE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE DO HELP ME. THANKS AND THANKS AND MILLION THANKS.


IP: Logged

jsarlak
Junior Member
posted March 16, 2004 14:00     Click Here to See the Profile for jsarlak     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dear Lovingperson,
I am an Iranian guy living in US for 30 years and obviously very familiar with Persian culture and Americans.
I never read forums of this kind and but red your e-mail accidentally…
I may be wrong but having few gray hairs in my head guessing you are in your twenties, having few relationship and experience with Persian and American women in my life I have some point of cautious or note for you:
I am not trying to discourage you or anything like that and you might ridicule my comments but if you go ahead and some how get your girl and take her to USA the way you wanted or not, still my comments might be useful for you.
Iran like any other traditional society with a long history has a very, very complex society and culture. Principally this country and people are full of contradictions.
Even with her complete parental approval you two are coming from a very different cultures Persian are extremely emotional and more so for women, connecting and communicating with these people is exceptionally tough!
Apparently, between the time of “Our hearts and doors are open for you…” and the time of “her father doesn’t agree with this marriage…” something major happened!! That either you don’t know or you didn’t mention in your e-mail and unless you find out about this incident or you can not solve this puzzle.
My suggestion to you: First of all, anything and everything is possible in Iran, therefore if I were you without having the intention of marriage in my mind (at least on this time or trip) I would go to Iran (assuming Tehran) and get a taste of food, weather, people and culture, find out first, despite of parental objections…if YOU are that person who really wanted and willing to get marry with somebody from that far away and that culture!?
Don’t be afraid be sincere and show them (her family) your respect and try your hardest to explain and convince them that you WOULD NOT MARRY this girl without her PARENTAL APPROVAL!! This is most important especially that we don’t have an embassy in Iran and you are almost on your own in Iran! As much as it sounds stupid or bizarre but don’t try to defy or challenge them “legally” if there is such a thing as law and legal process in Iran it is very rough road for Farsi speaking, Iranian and familiar with culture person, let alone you!
Start learning Farsi and liking Persian food and our culture which if you have open mind and are open minded, I 98% guarantee that you would like this people and culture.
You need to have an honest, familiar to culture, Farsi/English speaking, individual who can talk and negotiate for you with her family.
Remember, Iranian’s are extremely hospitable people and this fact would help you a lot and also prepare to change your faith and be a Moslem (of course for the sake of marriage and ceremony)!!
Lastly, remember you are not only marry that women you marry her family also, so try to know them and steal their heart, specially aunt and sister (women are very powerful in family structure in Iran, they are the one who make or brake this deal not father)

Good luck!

John

quote:
Originally posted by lovingperson:

Hi there every body. I am from America. I loved a girl from Iran. (She had the advance permission from her parents) to love me. For about nine months we exchanged our love on internet. Then we spoke on telephone extensvely. We are so much in love with each other that only God knows. Few weeks ago, when I told her that I am coming to Iran to marry her and take her with me. She and all her famiy including aunts and uncles were extremely delighted and she told me that her parents are telling her to convey this message to you that," Our hearts and doors are open for you too." Lo and behold, I purchased a ticket and called her to let her know. (as I used to do on regular basis) but First time ever, she didn't pick up the phone, insead her Mom spoke and told me that don't call her any more. Then I heard some very bad words from her father too and they completely closed their doors upon me without any reason. So much so that even today I don't know in what condition my would be wife is. During all this period I had received four very disturbing letters from her and it seems that her father and her eldest sister have literally tied her down and may be beating her too. She has begged me to forget her and she says that she is extremely fearful of her life and her furure because according to her...."Her father and her elder sister don't agree with this marriage any more. She has also told me that in Iran nothing can be done and that although she is 21 years old, still she cannot step out of her house without the permission of her parents or being accompanied by her mom or brother. She says she cannot touch the computer or pick up the phone. Twenty four hours some body is sitting around to watch her movements. She cannot obtain her passport neither she has her birth certificate in her hand and that she is very fearful of her life. She secretly sent me her latest photo. By this photo it looks like that if this situation continued any further either she will die on her own or her father will kill her any way.
My question to any body and every body is...... Is there really no way out in Iran that a young beauiful woman can be saved from those atrocities and be given a choice of her own life. Is there no such institution there that can help a helpless young girl. In civilized countries, we always have any and every kind of help available. She and I are very much afraid of her life. If Somebody is interested (in helping) I can show you few of her letters that even a mountain will melt down but not her father. I beg you all please to help me in the name of humanity and in the name of God who has created us equal. If you help me, you will help her in turn and one day I will return this favor.
PLEASE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE DO HELP ME. THANKS AND THANKS AND MILLION THANKS.


IP: Logged

All times are PT (US)

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | Iran Online | Privacy Statement

Iran Online is the registered trade mark of Manou & Associates Inc.
Copyright 1998-2004 Manou & Associates Inc., All rights reserved.

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.45c

The IranOnline.com